Kagen No Tsuki Final Thots

I haf said countless times tt I am a idealistic (or naive as to wat some called) person... Too idealistic for my own good... Becoz in reality, there is no such things as idealism, becoz human nature eventually evolves according to times and situations...

The more idealistic u r, the more u would get hurt... Becoz u believe in everything...

So whenever i see idealistic situations, i get pretty emotional... Which is one of the reasons y i cry at movies, anime, manga so much... Becoz unfortunately, these are the only places i see my own idealogy reflected back to me...

In a century where i thot my theories are weird, i never thot tt some ppl still use these kind of idealogy in their creations (though artificial), becoz i thot the audiences now are so practical tt nobody would follow or comprehend those kind of ideas anymore...

Look at movies nowadays, it is ok to haf mulitple partners, it is ok to haf flings becoz tts wat everybody is doing, it is ok to try relationships coz at most break lor, married then divorce lor, find another one, piss me off...

But every now and then, some would appear...

Kagen No Tsuki is a pretty dark world... While in tt story, the world is filled wif betrayal... Ur husband, bf, best fren, etc... Anyone can betray u, no matter how close or impt they r to u... There is no such thing as becoz i am ur husband, i would be loyal, becoz i am ur fren, i would help u... No such thing...

Its rather saddening also to find out Adam isnt as endearing as in the movie... He did not commit suicide so to speak, it wasnt a decision, he confessed tt he simply wasted his life away, sank into ultimate depression and so happened he had an overdose in drugs and died...

But it is also sad to see that in e manga, Adam's spirit would never be put to rest... Although its his punishment which he had accepted in the end, but then ending a story lidat is heavy for e heart u noe? At least the movie had the happy sweet ending ya?

Reading the manga, i understood y exactly he said to Mizuki, "Tis is ur fault, u died!" wif RAGE...

I saw something in the manga which e movie totally decided to differ, it might be unintentional... They might haf made the changes according to realism of reality...

The resolution of Mizuki, her stand wif Adam, their love were totally on 2 different grounds i thot...

In e manga, Mizuki returned to her body becoz she realised she wasnt alone anymore... She claimed tt she was lonely in e real world, which was y she had wanted to give up... It wasnt love tt bind her to follow Adam... But later Adam also said he lost to the strong hold in reality which was Tomoki...

Tis is not really how i like to see the story though... It made everything seemed too lightly n not worth fighting for...

In the movie, she knew everything, but chose to give her new life and e ppl ard her another chance and she wans to live her life to e fullest...

But in the manga, her memory is wiped clean after she returned... Tt to me, is unfair... It is more respectable if u make a decision when e noe e full picture...

I do not believe in reincarnation when ur memories are wiped clean... But of coz, if u do remember tts creepy also but tts another side of e story... But ideally, it is unfair to not noe wat u had gone thru when u r given another chance...

When u fall, u bleed, learn the lesson and try again... But if u can try again, but u forgot e lesson learnt, then there is no pt... It jus goes in a vicious cycle...

And also, it is sad tt becoz she couldnt remember anything, Hotaru lost her as a fren... How can lidat...

I thot there is something bout the manga which had a great impact... But the author used idealogy in tt case...

The idealogy in tis story lies in e character Hotaru... Hotaru helped Mizuki selflessly, and went all out for a person out of true genuine affection for another being... But of coz, she is idealistic becoz she is a child... It wouldnt be convincing if the author used a older character...

She mentioned something near e end of e manga, which is something i had been saying all along...

She said,

"U said earlier tt no matter wat we do, we couldnt help Eve (Mizuki) as long as she herself, doesnt wan to live... Ive always thot like tt... But now i wan to believe tt we haf the power to move Eve's heart with our wishes... I wan to believe that our wishes would be Eve's hope of living..."

And she tried her best, believing... And therefore, she saved her... Although she lost a fren afterwards, but its ok to her, as long as Eve is alive...

Tt is strong idealism which moved me...

I always say suicides in most cases, could be avoided if everyone pays attention to the ppl ard them... She tried to persuade her, but Eve was set on giving up n pushed her away many times, but she did not give up... She tried again and again, even though she knew she is not strong enuff...

Its exactly wat i haf been saying...

Ppl told me, tt it is all up to the individual, we cannot help, tis n tt... When i tell ppl some things, e 1st thing they tell me is always "I cant help u, only u can help urself!"... These are all bullshits and excuses... Never underestimate wat mere words can do... It can reach and save the most unimaginable... Wat do u think therapists are for?

Idealism doesnt exist anymore... Human nature had already changed...

Some frenz told me tt their best fren had suicided and they only found out days, weeks or mths after their deaths... I can only feel pity tt they even used the words, "best frens"...

Human values change... I guess thats how we haf to live wif it...

Btw, the movie Queen of the Damn is great... I love vampire movies... Although the movie is so long ago, it doesnt really feel so... Except tat they censored off so many parts till i dun even noe wat happened... Lol...