Frustration

I feel very frustrated lately. Very pissed at everything.

At our media, reporters, journalists, gahmen, family, frenz, everything. I see everything also angry, i watch shows, anime, movies, news, variety shows, i can somehow nitpick e smallest things (which are many, sadly) tt makes me angry.

Im not sure if its PMS, coz my last mth one was weird, so i do not noe whether tis mth coming earlier or not. Although i do feel very hungry now, but pls come after sat. I wan to donate blood lor! I donated my blood during my menses e 1st time, and i did not reveal it to e doc, so i am not sure whether i so called fainted isit coz of tt or not.

Judging fr last mth's menses, i knew i was under tremedous stress. Or at least enuff to affect me.

Its simply frustrating when everything ard u, isnt going well at all and tt everything ard other ppl's going extremely well. Just becoz those ppl r more lucky, rich, pretty or slim than me. WTH!!!

I just told my sis today after hearing about her new colleagues (she transfered branch), "Its so sad tt there r so many ppl who cannot find jobs and yet ur colleagues got high pay job and never take their work seriously."

Supposedly a job tt's fr 9 to 6.30pm. Her colleagues only come in fr 10-11am, and then at 12, they go eat a 3 hr lunch and then at 4, they left early. All e while e manager jus close one eye. Or rather he do e same too, he left at 3.

So bek cek lor. Ur job pays u better than other jobs and then those ppl got so sucky attitude. Ppl who wan to work, like me, wan to find job also cannot find. Bloody hell lor!!!!!!!!!! I knoe they very happy there, but its jus so unfair lor. Even my sis also lidat.

Maybe i shd act all holy n crap n feel god damn happy for those of u whos doing fine... But i cannot now, coz everything is not fine for me.

Argh, forget it.

I am jus so down. Though not e worst i haf had. But i am not gd. Sigh.

Life is jus so bloody unfair. Even in own families, same blood one, y e fate so different? Luck runs out? Kiss my foot! Ive not seen any lucky person run out of luck be4. And now see, i am so right. Say wat luck no more, no more ur head. Wan to gain sympathy then act vulnerable, now everything ok liao then so happy annouce to e whole world.

Even my lucky fren who quit his job, and tell me e job no gd, colleagues no gd tis n tt, then 1 week later, a job dropped fr e sky, double or triple his pay. Not one but two somemore. And somemore he sucks at work, character n attitude.

And still got e cheek to tell me, most of e time he no need find jobs one, usually jobs will come to him. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whoever tts passing judgement is jus blind. Dun tell me bullshit tt eventually things will become better, there will be kharma. Bullshit!

Ah crap.

Dun mind me. Maybe its really PMS.

My sis bf just popped over to sleep. I got to stop here... See, even wan to complain let things out also cannot. So unfair.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!